As the seasons threaten to turn here in the Pacific Northwest, and we just tasted our first drops of rain in over 90 days, the whispers of Autumn call. When working with the menstrual cycle as a tool for healing and transformation we find there are seasons of the menstrual cycle as well. My internal Autumn this month is aligning with the external seasonal shifts. I am on day thirty of my menstrual cycle so I feel a certain temporary authority to speak to the subject of the descent to the underworld. We all know it, run from it, embrace it or are in relationship with it in some way because we are humans. The invitation to the descent comes in many forms; Illness, loss, depression, overwhelm, trauma, the monthly turning of the wheel into the premenstrual phase of our cycle to name a few. We are all called throughout our lifetime to this season of the journey whether we go willingly or not.

The myth of Inanna, speaks to me now about how to navigate the descent I experience after ovulation and through the premenstrual and menstrual phases of my cycle. Inanna is the Ancient Sumerian goddess of love, fertility, procreation and of war. The Goddess/Queen willingly chooses to make her journey through the underworld to attend the funeral of her sister’s husband. She also hopes to gain the wisdom of the underworld and to bear witness to death for her own journey into wholeness. She then finds herself facing a new demon at each of the seven gates she must cross. In order to pass through each gate the demons demand Inanna give up something of value. Inanna faces her deepest fears and releases her worldly sense of self as she moves through each of these thresholds. She meets her older sister Ereshkigal, goddess of the underworld and the seven judges who ultimately deem her guilty and put her to death at the final crossing. It is not another’s death she must bear witness to, but her own. Inanna dies a rather gruesome death, naked and stripped of all the elements of her life as the Queen in the fertile world above.

I am sure that all of us could relate to this journey and apply it to many circumstances throughout our lives. As the story continues true to nature and mythology, the story does not end with surrender and death. Helpers are sent by a faithful friend from her kingdom who asks the Sun god for help. They make their way to the underworld and bring Inanna back in the most wonderful of ways. The goddess of the underworld, the shunned and forgotten Ereshkigal is mourning her husband who has died, she is also giving birth and is deep in the pains of childbirth. She is moving through the pain of loss and birth simultaneously and she moans out to the world. These helpers sent to the underworld give Ereshkigal empathy. They reflect back her pain, validate her experience and feel it themselves. They go into mourning beside her. They too call out. They validate her experience. For me personally this is the most powerful medicine to receive and give during an acute time of suffering. Can you relate to this experience? How?

So great is this gift that Ereshkigal asks what boon she can give them. They ask for the body of Inanna which they sprinkle with the water and food of life, bringing Inanna back to life and ready to return to the sun filled world above. Through this process Inanna has become intimate with the wisdom of the underworld and completed a full cycle of transformation.

This myth feels like medicine for me today as I think about the monthly descent that people who menstruate take. Indeed this myth has been interpreted in many ways: a Jungian journey to wholeness, an explanation of the seasons, a priestess’ right of passage, a story of retribution and just punishment (Isis in fact causes the death of her sister’s husband the Bull of Heaven in the myth of Gilgamesh). There seems to be truth in each of these theories.

For me at this moment it feels helpful to weave this story with structure, emotion and meaning mapping the process of release, death and rebirth into the menstrual wheel. It is gratifying to me to know that as I slip down into the transitional days after ovulation and deep into the Fall of my cycle that this is a worthy descent. There is meaning and purpose in this season and tasks that move towards my own higher evolution. I lift my chin high even as I feel my internal judgment increase. The body that I felt grateful for, that felt delicious, sensual and strong a few days before, now receives my critical eye. The tension of the duties of house and family begin to feel much heavier as my body’s very movements grow slower and heavier as well. All of us on the menstruating wheel embark on this descent each month, sometimes less willingly than we would hope. Myself included.

As we journey through the menstrual spiral, if attuned to the subtle cues and sometimes not so subtle messages it is clear that the descent into the underworld, the task of facing demons and releasing what does not serve is ours to have each and every month. The more we try to approach these gates willingly the more likely we are to be conscious of this meaning filled descent. That being said, everyone’s experience of the premenstrual phase is different. Some may be more comfortable with the Autumn of their cycle and struggle more with another phase. This is a very personal experience, though I am sure we can all relate with moving through a time of descent in our lives, simply cyclically with the natural seasons.

The more we know about what is coming in this time of change the more we can try to support our own needs. We can set up structures like, more childcare, a massage, a day of quiet, that support our whole being as we navigate this sometimes challenging terrain. I have young children and a full life so I very intimately understand the struggle. Some months I get it so right, turning into a goddess of death and rebirth rejoicing in my blood, deep rest, my body. Other months I am a very hot mess, trying to control the quickly building energy of the void. Yesterday I just spilled my breakfast smoothie in my car, was late to an appointment and not the nicest mama. So yes, these tasks are so hard. But wisdom comes from knowing where we are in the story and perhaps a few of the tasks that are calling to us in this moment.

The more I learn to honor the dark goddess and help my partner and children know of her return (aka day 23 for me), the more internal strength I grow for this returning descent. It does not mean it’s easy, or that I don’t want to run and hide, because I often do. Ever heard of chocolate and social media? But respecting these descents as a necessary turn of the wheel helps lessen resistance and escapism. This in turn builds the muscle of presence and the wholeness of embodied wisdom. Who knows? We may just become the heroine in our own transformational myth.

I for one do not always go willingly on my monthly journey of descent. When I feel the tug of my womb and the tightening of my critical mind my first reaction is to go faster. Try and get control of it all and batten down the hatches. Premenstrum is an ideal time for power cleaning the house to be sure. I simply would like to do it for the right reasons. Not for fear of total chaos, loss of control and running from emotions. You know the drill. Don’t get me wrong, rage cleaning is the best! But I challenge all of us, that when the season of descent comes to call, and my dear ones, it always does, how shall we meet it? In all honesty 75 percent of the time I meet it tense, over extending, starting tiffs with my partner or hiding under my covers. But guess what? We get so many chances at this! Every month is a cycle of transformation, a lived cycle of life, death and rebirth. Every month we get to learn, fall, learn some more and keep trying. Let’s celebrate the moments of consciousness together. Celebrate when we held back the judgment, breathed through the temper tantrum and chose to take a bath and drink tea instead of screens.

As Spring follows Winter, so too does Inanna, goddess of love and fertility return to her throne. There are a few more hiccups as the story goes, such as a sacrificed husband but that story is for another day. Though it may feel that we will never rise again when things feel at their hardest, the wheel always continues to spin. Growth and regeneration can’t help but bubble up after the full rest and release of Winter. Each season is as essential as the rest. Inanna knew this even if she was not fully aware of the sacrifices she would have to make. So too can we edge ourselves into a more conscious descent. Stay away from the phone a little longer, breathe through that emotion a few more seconds, knowing that we are growing wholeness. Even an ancient Sumerian fertility goddess struggled with this process so don’t forget to go gently, gently my dears.

The premenstrual phase’s task is bringing up the parts of life that might need adjustment, and make them glaringly obvious. Then the bleed comes to aid in release, death to the old and ultimately, rebirth. It is truly miraculous that we get to live this intrinsic cycle of transformation seeded deep in creation itself, each month! So yes the challenges are great, and yet the pay off is divine.

I bid you all the grace of Inanna when it is your season of descent. The deeper you go my friend the greater the glow. I bid you deep dark release and all the abundance and early morning glow of the ever returning Spring.

***A journal exercise the next time you feel the underworld calling you into descent use Inanna as your guide. We will use the myth in a Jungian context. Each demon is an aspect of yourself. They can come in many forms. It could be feeling cut off, it could be health issues, it could be fear of loss, it could be jealousy, it could be putting off what you really want. It could be not giving yourself enough grace. What demons do you face at each of the seven gates? Are there more gates or less? What do you let go of as you face each of these demons? Can you think of a physical symbol, image or word for each gate that you are facing?

(A huge thanks to my awesome editor Sydney Montanaro, and happy Birthday to you dear friend!)

And thank you to all you wonderful humans who take the time to read and open to this offering. Last March marked one year of Peach! This season feels new and I am listening in and opening to new developments. Stay tuned.

With so much love,

Jamie

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